Not a massage for the squeamish, or pregnant-ish…
I don’t even know how to introduce this one, except that it’s really gross … and yet also one of those epic train wrecks that you just can’t seem to look away from.
Also, this train happens to be made out of semen, so I guess you could say that it’s not exactly for the squeamish or those under the age of about 35!
Maybe I’ll just leave you with an excerpt. Yeah – that should be nice and safe…
How I Might Have Just Become the Newest Urban Legend
Even though it’s very difficult to climb up on a massage table when you’re eight months pregnant, but I manage to sort of shuffle-scoot between the sheet and the heavy blanket and as I scoot I realize, I’m wet.
I’m wet but also, it’s like I found a spot I didn’t dry off somehow after I took my shower. But I know that’s not possible, because I showered more than fifteen minutes ago. But it’s dark in there, and I’m already on my side, so I kind of rub at where I’m wet, which is all around this part here of my hips and butt and I’m like, “This is kind of like a gel, maybe I got into some lotion or… but I don’t know. I can’t feel my fingers, so I’m not sure what I’m touching here. So maybe I’ll just smell it.
And it smells like semen.
And that is because it is semen.
Just trust me and read the story! It solicited an actual LOL from me at one point, so I promise that the eight pages of poor Pam’s misery will totally be worth it… 😉