Horrible Baby Food Flavors

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I just fed to my child the most disgusting baby food flavor imaginable.

Kale … Broccoli … and Mango

I can’t imagine a baby food flavor brainstorming session where that particular combination was thrown out to the room and didn’t get immediately shot down. Even if you’re the boss’s cousin, or you let your own toddler pick flavors by just pointing to things in the grocery store at random, it never should’ve happened.

I fear for the worst if this is to be the future of baby food flavor combinations here in the civilized world…

• Yogurt + Bleu Cheese + Bananas
• Carrots + Asparagus + Rusty Nails
• Burning Tires + Cherry Tomatoes + Fingernail Clippings
• Unused Diaper Remnants + Particle Board + Nacho Cheese Doritos
• Baby Farts + Baby Boogers + French Vanilla Ice Cream
• Dominos Pizza
• Hazardous Waste + Baked Beans + Discount 4th of July Fireworks
• White Wine Vinegar + The Grey Hair of an Ex-President + Apples
• An XBox 360 + Moose Warts + Cottage Cheese
• 1992 Academy Award Nominee Catherine Deneuve + Totino’s Pizza Rolls + Fresh Strawberry Puree
• Paste, Like That Kind You Ate In Kindergarten + Thousand Island Dressing + Hiccups
• Kale + Kale + Kale
• My First Car, a 1988 Oldsmobile Cutlass Calais + My High School Dream of Becoming a Rock Star + One Year After Graduating High School
• Dog Food + Global Warming + Quaker Instant Oatmeal (Apple Cinnamon flavor)
• Kale + Broccoli + Mango + A Flux Capacitor Forcing Us to Experience This Mistake of a Flavor Combination All Over Again