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Kanye West Leads Academy to Hand Out Grammys for Participation

© bogonet / Dollar Photo Club

LOS ANGELES (Just Laugh) – Though not everyone was a winner at the 57th Annual Grammy Awards Sunday night, due to recent feedback from some of the most vocal musicians in the business, that’s going to change next year for the 58th Annual awards celebration.

“We’d just like to formally announce that the Academy has heard the words of Kanye West in particular very clear,” Academy Chair Christine Albert announced in a statement this morning. “And while it’s been our longstanding tradition to honor the best talent in the recording industry each year with our much anticipated festivities, we certainly don’t want any of our talented musicians to feel left out or not as good because they or one of their close friends wasn’t able to bring home one of our prized trophies for themselves on a given year.”

“That’s why starting in 2016,” Albert explained, “the Academy is proud to introduce a new category in our prestigious awards ceremony in which each and every member of the recording industry is already a winner, from the singers and songwriters themselves down to the composers, the marketing directors, and even those guys who stand on the corner in New York City handing out fliers – everyone!”

“Honestly, we just feel terrible that Mr. West feels so slighted for his friend Beyoncé not winning Album of the Year,” Albert told us candidly, “and because we all know that this certainly isn’t the first time that Mr. West has expressed his disappointment with our selection process, for the Academy this was a real sign that there was something that needed to be done differently. We want all of our promising musicians to enjoy the excitement that comes from walking up on that stage and collecting their very own Grammy, and starting next year, we’re proud to be able to do just that.”

“As a side note,” Albert added with a moderate sigh, “the Grammys will now be 47 hours long, thus offering even more opportunities for Mr. West to jump on stage and interrupt people throughout the show, so we’re still working on that. Nobody’s perfect…”

About Scott Sevener (580 Posts since 2001)
The Co-Founder and Editor-in-Chief of Just Laugh, Scott writes about the random things in life that amuse him - from the miracle of childbirth to the bologna sandwich he just ate for breakfast. He currently resides in Tampa, FL with a girl, a baby, and a dog that never shuts the hell up.