Manatee Drops to 5th Most Delicious Endangered Species

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Crystal River, FL (Just Laugh) – Citing fierce competition from its land-dwelling brethren, the West Indian Manatee, also known somewhat insultingly as the Sea Cow, found itself one spot lower with regards to its overall deliciousness as an endangered species in 2015.

Assembled by the National Association for Eating Illegal Things, the list found the small in size, but big in flavor Black-Footed Ferret narrowly edging out the abominable Sea Cow for 4th place while the prime positions for six years running remained locked down by the Sumatran Rhino at #3, the adorable Borneo Pygmy Elephant at #2, and of course, never one to forego providing a feast fit for an entire village, the ever-dominating Blue Whale, with its 200 tons of delicious flesh continuing to boast by far a most delicious harvest for anyone lucky enough to drag one of the mighty beasts to shore.

“It was a tough call this year,” explained master conservationist chef Jeff Barnesworth, “but the ferret’s tender meat when slow-roasted over a wood fire is a divine experience, especially when glazed with just a hint of honey barbecue sauce.”

“Now don’t get me wrong,” Barnesworth was quick to add, “all of us here at NAEIT still love us some Manatee – in fact, I’m thinking about grilling up a couple of steaks when I get home tonight. Unless we see some new culinary developments in maybe the gorilla or orangutan areas over the next year, I see no reason why the West Indian Manatee shouldn’t be able to hold its own at #5, which is still a notable position for any species on the endangered list.”