How will you be celebrating St. Patrick’s Day? Painting entire body festive shade of green Dancing through the fields in search of shamrocks Deep prayer in the name [...]
What color is this pair of hippopotamuses? Black and Blue White and Gold Kind of a Dirty Browny Grey-y Absolutely Adorable Hippos are the most ferocious killers in the animal [...]
How would you like your March? Is Easter in it this year? If not, I don’t care… In like Lionheart, out like Lampchop. God just please make the snow go away! [...]
Which new category would you like to see added to the Oscars? Best Film That 89% of Americans Never Saw Best Ridiculous Movie Featuring Tornados and Sharks Best Use of Taco [...]
How do you plan on celebrating Presidents’ Day? Posting words of gentle encouragement for our current leader on Facebook. SAVINGS! SAVINGS!! SAVINGS!!! Washington vs [...]
What would you like for Valentine’s Day? Fifteen minutes alone with the new Magic Mike trailer. 50 Shades of Could You Please Just Rinse Your Damn Dishes?! A dozen red [...]
How many cereals have you eaten? So far 47 today. Just Cheerios. Ok, sometimes Honey Nut Cheerios. Does oatmeal count? None – because those bastard kids will never [...]
Which team are you rooting for??? San Diego Leg Warmers New York Subway Streakers Miami LOL We’re Not Frozen-ers Detroit Pawn Brokers Chicago Libertarians Boston Nose [...]
What are you hoping to hear from this week’s State of the Union address? new flavor of Oreos – Red, White, and Blueberry Joe Biden’s award-winning duck call [...]
Which New Years Resolution are you most regretting already in 2015? wearing pants losing 10 lbs exclusively through kegel exercises generally being a better person promising [...]